Subjects needing special intensive revision 

We need to go back to school. Prof Jagdeep Chhokar’s passing made me realise this since his Association for Democratic Reforms was currently opposing SIR. Not only Bihar poll-rolls, many subjects must be specially and intensively revised. So much old syllabus has been dumped in the dust-bin of history. Achha let’s start with that only.

Some fuddy-duddy teacher forced us to mug up stuff about foreigners who took an inch and became rulers. He warned that if we don’t learn the lessons of history, we are doomed to repeat it. Ha! What a fool he was, and anti-national too. Why we need to learn about Akbar-bakbar who tried combining all faiths? Stuppid, no? Let’s not din such illahi-conceived notions into students any longer. 

Same way, throw out chapters on nitwit Brits. Because of them only we are stuck with crazy angrezi which has kept us away from our vishwa destiny. Good thing we are also throwing their names out of our map. 

Which brings me to geography. Much has been revised, and other ethnic communities are proudly-loudly demanding more. Political map was first redrawn on linguistic lines then cultural ones. Hill people plainsly say they want their own state. China also keeps trying to revise our borders, but Trump has stalled that – no controversy here. 

SIR-ji, physical map also needs you. Hills have been flattened thanks to ferocious monsoon and mining frenzy. Himalayan riverbeds have become Air BnBs; an airport terminal has landed on Mumbai’s Mithi river. 

Forget physical and political maps. Let’s look at Physics. That toh keeps getting special intensive confirmation from political sources. Take Rahul G. He appears to lack gravity, but is a textbook case of all three Newtonian Laws. The First: he remains inert unless acted upon by an external force. Second Law: he illustrates the relationship between force, mass, and acceleration; Newton’s  F=ma is revised to Family, mother, grandma. Third Law: for every BJP action there’s invariably an equal and opposite reaction from RaGa. QED.

Einstein’s E=mc2? SIR, you may be special to Bihar polls, but all poll-itical relativity gets intensely revised. Energetically.